{/Friday, January 27, 2006, @8:27 AM.
{ last sun's (22/1/06) family gathering and abt Eve... }
i had fun at the family gathering last sun (22/1/06) haha. At first, i was dreading it a little as it's a Sunday and thr's school the nxt day plus i haven't finished my homework haa. Started the texting thing with Pam again, i got the feeling we used to get from this. Lovely.
Played catching with the kids. Yeah! it was really fun! i could exercise but i ate a lot too haha, cos was quite bored at first. One good thing about playing with kids is there's this tendency for u to run faster than them so you won't get caught that often. Ha, cos when i was younger, i wasn't exactly the fastest or my stamina wasn't that great, so i'd get caught very easily if the catcher was targetting me.
Will post pics when i upload them from Pa's digicam haha... realized i haven posted any of me in my new specs right? Ha, hold on then, cos Yeek is gonna send me the ones we took in school(photo-taking session mostly by Synn's phone like wedding photo taking haha) ha... soon, after CNY she meant haha...
So yup, the boys were Ryan 11, Matthew 10, John 8, oh shoot i forgot this very cute, bearish boy who's 6, i keep spinning him around too ha. and Jun, 6 or 7 i think. Yuppy yup yup, i did really have fun!
~-_-~
Yesterday, Eve bad-mooded(learnt from Cybell, i think it's crescent slang ha) in the l8r part of the day. I wouldn't go to too much details but what i'm saying here is, i really feel very comforted that she did feel better after talking to me. It's like if someone told u they don't think you understand them, it really does hurt cos u thought u were very close with that person.
Regardless of ur understanding of a person, i feel there's something happening in the background of the friendship bcos of times u 2 went thru and u will know how to react when ur fren is in a pit or in a foul mood though you wouldn't know how to explain it. Oh shoot! hope u all understand what i'm trying to bring across. :0
In my perspective, i think no one really completely understands anyone. Cos people keep changing, there are some times when pple react differently and u'd never be able to guess what sort of reaction that is.
Nonetheless, after reaching home, we talked on the phone a lil' and i asked her how would she feel if she din talk to me on the bus. (we chatted, trying to piece our thoughts tgt and sorting them out) She said she'd definitely feel sad, as if no one cared about her. Hence, it's really good to talk to ME. yeah! I'M NOT being thick-skinned here but i'm just so so so glad that's how she feel and she was cheered up.
One thing i realize, people affect each other. Even if you think you are not being affected at all, i still think you are affected by the slightest bit. You can choose to disagree, cos i dun think i'm right all the time as i'm still finding answers. Think there's a meaning of life in this: "To find the answers as i live and experience and learn...."
Another thing both of us realized, it's good to talk to sum1 about something cos as you talk, your thinking patterns become clearer. Very often, if you think alone, sometimes ur thoughts will be drifting around and they are scattered. That is why i've read that writing is encouraged for patients, because as you write, u use more of ur senses, like ur hand as u write, ur eyes as u see and ur thoughts in ur brain sorta form.
Well well well, enough about all these. I just discovered it's been long since i wrote about things other than what goes on in my life and these are thoughts i have, or they just pop up as i'm writing now or when i talk to people. So well... hope my mum never finds out i never went on fri for cny celebrations in school. Even if she does, hope she takes it in her stride well. Gonna go jss later with Pam pam and eve hee, den will go jp to do some shopping.
and then...
off to MSIA JEMALUANG WE GO!!! it's really sth i look forward to. I vow to post any pics taken from Pa's digicam if i find them worthwhile ha. I'm growing up... i mean this outfit i bought. HEE HAW!
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Played catching with the kids. Yeah! it was really fun! i could exercise but i ate a lot too haha, cos was quite bored at first. One good thing about playing with kids is there's this tendency for u to run faster than them so you won't get caught that often. Ha, cos when i was younger, i wasn't exactly the fastest or my stamina wasn't that great, so i'd get caught very easily if the catcher was targetting me.
Will post pics when i upload them from Pa's digicam haha... realized i haven posted any of me in my new specs right? Ha, hold on then, cos Yeek is gonna send me the ones we took in school(photo-taking session mostly by Synn's phone like wedding photo taking haha) ha... soon, after CNY she meant haha...
So yup, the boys were Ryan 11, Matthew 10, John 8, oh shoot i forgot this very cute, bearish boy who's 6, i keep spinning him around too ha. and Jun, 6 or 7 i think. Yuppy yup yup, i did really have fun!
~-_-~
Yesterday, Eve bad-mooded(learnt from Cybell, i think it's crescent slang ha) in the l8r part of the day. I wouldn't go to too much details but what i'm saying here is, i really feel very comforted that she did feel better after talking to me. It's like if someone told u they don't think you understand them, it really does hurt cos u thought u were very close with that person.
Regardless of ur understanding of a person, i feel there's something happening in the background of the friendship bcos of times u 2 went thru and u will know how to react when ur fren is in a pit or in a foul mood though you wouldn't know how to explain it. Oh shoot! hope u all understand what i'm trying to bring across. :0
In my perspective, i think no one really completely understands anyone. Cos people keep changing, there are some times when pple react differently and u'd never be able to guess what sort of reaction that is.
Nonetheless, after reaching home, we talked on the phone a lil' and i asked her how would she feel if she din talk to me on the bus. (we chatted, trying to piece our thoughts tgt and sorting them out) She said she'd definitely feel sad, as if no one cared about her. Hence, it's really good to talk to ME. yeah! I'M NOT being thick-skinned here but i'm just so so so glad that's how she feel and she was cheered up.
One thing i realize, people affect each other. Even if you think you are not being affected at all, i still think you are affected by the slightest bit. You can choose to disagree, cos i dun think i'm right all the time as i'm still finding answers. Think there's a meaning of life in this: "To find the answers as i live and experience and learn...."
Another thing both of us realized, it's good to talk to sum1 about something cos as you talk, your thinking patterns become clearer. Very often, if you think alone, sometimes ur thoughts will be drifting around and they are scattered. That is why i've read that writing is encouraged for patients, because as you write, u use more of ur senses, like ur hand as u write, ur eyes as u see and ur thoughts in ur brain sorta form.
Well well well, enough about all these. I just discovered it's been long since i wrote about things other than what goes on in my life and these are thoughts i have, or they just pop up as i'm writing now or when i talk to people. So well... hope my mum never finds out i never went on fri for cny celebrations in school. Even if she does, hope she takes it in her stride well. Gonna go jss later with Pam pam and eve hee, den will go jp to do some shopping.
and then...
off to MSIA JEMALUANG WE GO!!! it's really sth i look forward to. I vow to post any pics taken from Pa's digicam if i find them worthwhile ha. I'm growing up... i mean this outfit i bought. HEE HAW!
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{/Saturday, January 21, 2006, @3:13 PM.
{ Singing session with Synn and Jennifer hee! plus the very weird DREAM.. }
It's confirmed, i'm lazy to blog these days.
Maybe fatigue is included... mAYBE NOT, COS i'm blogging now again ha!
Went singing with Synn and Jennifer yesterday hee. :))) Felt a bit weird at first
but realized that e part of my brain that ctrls madness was very active and the part of e brain tat ctrls shyness was being overpowered like that ha!
We just went HAYWIRE in there! Like standing and jumping and butt-twisting+shaking(for Synn!) on the seat ahha. Jennifer's signature move is hands and feet clapping ahha...THAT WAS really funny!think she looks like a too grown-up baby with that move(?) Mine was just swaying around and trying to follow mtv's dance steps. hha...
though i dun really like jolin, i think i'm starting to like her(mayb the rebel will throw a chair at me) ahah, but even Synn says she does too ahhahahah... Cos we did have fun singing her song. "zhao Pai dong zhuo" the one that goes "up up, da da da" "up up dadada" or sth like that haha. The dance moves very easily to follow n makes u high when u do it haa...
Mmm... so had fun in the end, though we were kinda desperate, poor lasses--> us ahhaha... praying more money would surface and appear to us as we searched in our wallets.Cos we had to pay an extra 14 bucks for 2 drinks if we wanna extend our time to 1 more pathetic hour![What the bloody HELL! (~_~)] !uNScRupulous BUSINESSPEOPLE but wad to do, we sorta love singing. At least, i'm sure I DO!
~*~*~
\Now, about the very real and weird dream!/
We were in some exhibition place where u could buy stuff from. I walked past a Body Shop mini-shop and saw no one there. Saw 2 combs thr(They haf these very nice combs that are good for the hair. *Muz be i wanted it when Eve bought it that time* I took them...
All was fine until we got to the exit. I started to feel that the security guards were on alert. Caught the eye of one of them and i started running for my life! Went outside and found myself at a dead end where the dark sea was below. Everyone(i'm not sure who they are, just pple i know, includes my famiy and relatives) I jumped down and Spiderman saved me!
After that, there's this guy who's my bf and he ran with me, tgt with his younger sis.*muz be after the session yest. aft GP where we talked abt elder bros and younger sistas-->Yeek and Cybell shd know* I dunno how he looks like but he's those type of rugged guy, with a bit of tattoos and wears faded-off jeans. *Muz be watching Love Concierge whereby Alex Toh is the kinda guy i sorta admire cos they do whatever they want and is the rugged type hee (^_^)*
So, the trio ran and ran, till we reached NTU, this university around my place. We tried seeking refuge from the dorm thr. Stayed for a while and Sth weird happened. I saw Cybell thr sayin she doesnt know why she's doing what she's doing as she has A levels this yr and she's like stupid to run away like a fugitive with me.
That's not all.
We(not with Cybell, but the guy and his younger sister) ran again and this time we sorta ended up at e other 2's late father's fren's house. He's a police officer and i dunno why i just went up. Not long after, they told me that my parents were coming to get me and i was wondering if i had to turn in myself. They said yeah i had to and i'm like "do i have to go to jail?" they went,"do you wanna go back with ur parents even if u knew u had to go to jail?"
think that scared the wits outta me cos i really can't imagine myself in jail though i've thought that it wouldn't be too bad after all. but still, i'm scared... Think that woke me up and the dream ended there, but not before i saw Yeek's face as the younger sister.
But i'm sure she's not the younger sister, i had the feeling that i din know that person. *Muz b sch startin and i've been seeing too much of Yeek and Cybell.*
All in all, REALLY WEIRD! and it's been long since i had such a dream where everything is as fresh and clear as it really did happened. But i'm really scared to steal things. So i'm not gonna do that eveR! Oh ya, my bf was sorta helpless in that part too though my feelings were that i enjoyed my times running away with them! ????!!! What the HELL IS HAPPENING TO ME?
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Maybe fatigue is included... mAYBE NOT, COS i'm blogging now again ha!
Went singing with Synn and Jennifer yesterday hee. :))) Felt a bit weird at first
but realized that e part of my brain that ctrls madness was very active and the part of e brain tat ctrls shyness was being overpowered like that ha!
We just went HAYWIRE in there! Like standing and jumping and butt-twisting+shaking(for Synn!) on the seat ahha. Jennifer's signature move is hands and feet clapping ahha...THAT WAS really funny!think she looks like a too grown-up baby with that move(?) Mine was just swaying around and trying to follow mtv's dance steps. hha...
though i dun really like jolin, i think i'm starting to like her(mayb the rebel will throw a chair at me) ahah, but even Synn says she does too ahhahahah... Cos we did have fun singing her song. "zhao Pai dong zhuo" the one that goes "up up, da da da" "up up dadada" or sth like that haha. The dance moves very easily to follow n makes u high when u do it haa...
Mmm... so had fun in the end, though we were kinda desperate, poor lasses--> us ahhaha... praying more money would surface and appear to us as we searched in our wallets.Cos we had to pay an extra 14 bucks for 2 drinks if we wanna extend our time to 1 more pathetic hour![What the bloody HELL! (~_~)] !uNScRupulous BUSINESSPEOPLE but wad to do, we sorta love singing. At least, i'm sure I DO!
~*~*~
\Now, about the very real and weird dream!/
We were in some exhibition place where u could buy stuff from. I walked past a Body Shop mini-shop and saw no one there. Saw 2 combs thr(They haf these very nice combs that are good for the hair. *Muz be i wanted it when Eve bought it that time* I took them...
All was fine until we got to the exit. I started to feel that the security guards were on alert. Caught the eye of one of them and i started running for my life! Went outside and found myself at a dead end where the dark sea was below. Everyone(i'm not sure who they are, just pple i know, includes my famiy and relatives) I jumped down and Spiderman saved me!
After that, there's this guy who's my bf and he ran with me, tgt with his younger sis.*muz be after the session yest. aft GP where we talked abt elder bros and younger sistas-->Yeek and Cybell shd know* I dunno how he looks like but he's those type of rugged guy, with a bit of tattoos and wears faded-off jeans. *Muz be watching Love Concierge whereby Alex Toh is the kinda guy i sorta admire cos they do whatever they want and is the rugged type hee (^_^)*
So, the trio ran and ran, till we reached NTU, this university around my place. We tried seeking refuge from the dorm thr. Stayed for a while and Sth weird happened. I saw Cybell thr sayin she doesnt know why she's doing what she's doing as she has A levels this yr and she's like stupid to run away like a fugitive with me.
That's not all.
We(not with Cybell, but the guy and his younger sister) ran again and this time we sorta ended up at e other 2's late father's fren's house. He's a police officer and i dunno why i just went up. Not long after, they told me that my parents were coming to get me and i was wondering if i had to turn in myself. They said yeah i had to and i'm like "do i have to go to jail?" they went,"do you wanna go back with ur parents even if u knew u had to go to jail?"
think that scared the wits outta me cos i really can't imagine myself in jail though i've thought that it wouldn't be too bad after all. but still, i'm scared... Think that woke me up and the dream ended there, but not before i saw Yeek's face as the younger sister.
But i'm sure she's not the younger sister, i had the feeling that i din know that person. *Muz b sch startin and i've been seeing too much of Yeek and Cybell.*
All in all, REALLY WEIRD! and it's been long since i had such a dream where everything is as fresh and clear as it really did happened. But i'm really scared to steal things. So i'm not gonna do that eveR! Oh ya, my bf was sorta helpless in that part too though my feelings were that i enjoyed my times running away with them! ????!!! What the HELL IS HAPPENING TO ME?
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{/Sunday, January 15, 2006, @9:35 PM.
{ TIS A HAPPY POST! to be living, is enough... had fun with flamez! }
Woah hohoho! Just saw that it's e 200th post on this blog. Great to know it, just when i'm starting to be lazy again and having thoughts of not blogging...
Retail therapy really exists! Especially when u don't do it too often, at least, that's in my opinion. I really had fun with part of Flamez yesterday! yeah! MWAHAHAHAH! The only thing lacking was pictures! We should have put neoprints as a very top priority. Still, we did have fun!!! I'm really looking forward to going out again cos i know i have the power to psycho myself to make it a great outing ahha...
On another note, time passes real fast when we're enjoying it. We actually spent abt an hour in just one mini-shop cos we were the only ones in it and we just took it as our home and changed and changed into many diff. outfits ahha... The many outfits we changed into just transformed our personalities. For instance,
Little Rebel--She looks really sweet in this top with many small pink flowers, i think. Eve's comment of her being someone's girlfriend brought out the very haunting laughter of her ahha... She bought it for 10 bucks.
Me--This kinda cHI-NA top i wore got comments like, "looks like Xia Yi"... bla bla bla. But i really like my brown wrap-up(?) with the lime green tube and beige pants...with my RED SPECS. they all said it was nice too. i'm really satisfied with it n i FEEL GREAT! Ha!
Synn--The auntie even commented that, "She's pretty girl, so wear anything also nice". It's true la, you won't look at her parts which are not so flattering, but it's still very nice ahaha. Girls grow up and change, yah...
Eve--Looks real nice in what she wore yesterday. A white cut-off coat with a v. feminine tube in beige and 3/4 jeans was wad she wore when we met her. In that shop, she changed into a pink lacy spag haha. Really feminine! Woo, she's growing up too.
What i feel: Red specs woo! makes me assertive.
i really feel confident and feel like someone with a stronger character. Yeah!(said in a sensual way ahha) in mandarin, "you(3) xing(4) ge(2)
Sadly, i dun have a digicam to take pics with and den post on my blog for now. Hope any of Pa's photography frens wins some so we can buy from them at a cheaper rate ahha...
oh ya;:; Ris: i'm sure we'll go shopping once again. This is specially written to you ahha...
Though shopping was great, i'm left with a dollar of my pay. Nvm though, we're gonna work for cny and after that, i'll have money to go singing and relieve stress caused by studies ha! Yeah yeah! really like a few of black eyed peas songs very much. Like "Dont Lie"-- nononono, baby nononono don't LIE-AHhhh... and Pump it' --- pump it! LOuDER pump IT Louder! turn up the radio! Blast the STEREO rIGHT noW!!!
sINGING is great too~ coupled with dancing. I dun care, i'm gonna make everyone dance with me in the kbox room when we go SINGING NEXT ahhaah!! letting loose just makes u feel great!
sth else that makes me feel my life is very full now: G. Although Flamez or other peeps(though very little) may think it's real cheesy and ewww... but i would just like to say:
If i dun think of the future and cherish the moment then, i feel real satisfied and glad that i have such a fren! so far away, yet so near... If i keep thinking about the future, and talking about it... it exasperates me and we fight. Acc. to him, I'm the one who started to fight. upon reflection, he's right ahah... But so glad to receive that txt from G when i least expect it. It's true that "the things that comes when it's least expected means the most!"
Right now, i'm sure who ever is reading this entry can feel my happiness. It just oozes out uncontrollably. Music helps too! Listening to Cyndi Wang's "Jie Mao Wan Wan" now. I love the melody, so full of oriental feel ha.. Realize tat i dun have to be the richest, own the most things, go clubbing(i stil feel it's an identity) bla bla bla, to feel full at this MOMENT! hOPE i can feel like this very often!
Though sadness and grief for many others, is chosen not to be felt by many others, i feel that if i do, i'd get the whole human experience, and pple grow from bad situations ahha... Ta da, just feel very full now.
Sth about me: When i'm feeling sad, or negative, whatever i think is negative and it just sux practically! But, when i'm satiated, really feeling this sense of happiness that might not be exciting, just that tranquility and serenity of it, satisfies me fully and i'm calm and collected. Alright, enough about all this, i gtg work on some homework now haa..
LIVE LIFE TO THE FULLEST! GO SINGING, SHOPPING, WITH FRENS. dRINK COFFEE, WATCH MOVIES,
READ READ READ AND READ! tHAT'S real impt!i'm reading a book which is the sequel to Totto-chan: the girl by the window, translated into mandarin... Will talk about it more since this is one of the "woo-ah!" books.
Really feeling good now. That so many things are working out for me and i look forward to everyday and the great things it brings. Live for the present moment, of cuz the future too!
This is just one happy post!
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Retail therapy really exists! Especially when u don't do it too often, at least, that's in my opinion. I really had fun with part of Flamez yesterday! yeah! MWAHAHAHAH! The only thing lacking was pictures! We should have put neoprints as a very top priority. Still, we did have fun!!! I'm really looking forward to going out again cos i know i have the power to psycho myself to make it a great outing ahha...
On another note, time passes real fast when we're enjoying it. We actually spent abt an hour in just one mini-shop cos we were the only ones in it and we just took it as our home and changed and changed into many diff. outfits ahha... The many outfits we changed into just transformed our personalities. For instance,
Little Rebel--She looks really sweet in this top with many small pink flowers, i think. Eve's comment of her being someone's girlfriend brought out the very haunting laughter of her ahha... She bought it for 10 bucks.
Me--This kinda cHI-NA top i wore got comments like, "looks like Xia Yi"... bla bla bla. But i really like my brown wrap-up(?) with the lime green tube and beige pants...with my RED SPECS. they all said it was nice too. i'm really satisfied with it n i FEEL GREAT! Ha!
Synn--The auntie even commented that, "She's pretty girl, so wear anything also nice". It's true la, you won't look at her parts which are not so flattering, but it's still very nice ahaha. Girls grow up and change, yah...
Eve--Looks real nice in what she wore yesterday. A white cut-off coat with a v. feminine tube in beige and 3/4 jeans was wad she wore when we met her. In that shop, she changed into a pink lacy spag haha. Really feminine! Woo, she's growing up too.
What i feel: Red specs woo! makes me assertive.
i really feel confident and feel like someone with a stronger character. Yeah!(said in a sensual way ahha) in mandarin, "you(3) xing(4) ge(2)
Sadly, i dun have a digicam to take pics with and den post on my blog for now. Hope any of Pa's photography frens wins some so we can buy from them at a cheaper rate ahha...
oh ya;:; Ris: i'm sure we'll go shopping once again. This is specially written to you ahha...
Though shopping was great, i'm left with a dollar of my pay. Nvm though, we're gonna work for cny and after that, i'll have money to go singing and relieve stress caused by studies ha! Yeah yeah! really like a few of black eyed peas songs very much. Like "Dont Lie"-- nononono, baby nononono don't LIE-AHhhh... and Pump it' --- pump it! LOuDER pump IT Louder! turn up the radio! Blast the STEREO rIGHT noW!!!
sINGING is great too~ coupled with dancing. I dun care, i'm gonna make everyone dance with me in the kbox room when we go SINGING NEXT ahhaah!! letting loose just makes u feel great!
sth else that makes me feel my life is very full now: G. Although Flamez or other peeps(though very little) may think it's real cheesy and ewww... but i would just like to say:
If i dun think of the future and cherish the moment then, i feel real satisfied and glad that i have such a fren! so far away, yet so near... If i keep thinking about the future, and talking about it... it exasperates me and we fight. Acc. to him, I'm the one who started to fight. upon reflection, he's right ahah... But so glad to receive that txt from G when i least expect it. It's true that "the things that comes when it's least expected means the most!"
Right now, i'm sure who ever is reading this entry can feel my happiness. It just oozes out uncontrollably. Music helps too! Listening to Cyndi Wang's "Jie Mao Wan Wan" now. I love the melody, so full of oriental feel ha.. Realize tat i dun have to be the richest, own the most things, go clubbing(i stil feel it's an identity) bla bla bla, to feel full at this MOMENT! hOPE i can feel like this very often!
Though sadness and grief for many others, is chosen not to be felt by many others, i feel that if i do, i'd get the whole human experience, and pple grow from bad situations ahha... Ta da, just feel very full now.
Sth about me: When i'm feeling sad, or negative, whatever i think is negative and it just sux practically! But, when i'm satiated, really feeling this sense of happiness that might not be exciting, just that tranquility and serenity of it, satisfies me fully and i'm calm and collected. Alright, enough about all this, i gtg work on some homework now haa..
LIVE LIFE TO THE FULLEST! GO SINGING, SHOPPING, WITH FRENS. dRINK COFFEE, WATCH MOVIES,
READ READ READ AND READ! tHAT'S real impt!i'm reading a book which is the sequel to Totto-chan: the girl by the window, translated into mandarin... Will talk about it more since this is one of the "woo-ah!" books.
Really feeling good now. That so many things are working out for me and i look forward to everyday and the great things it brings. Live for the present moment, of cuz the future too!
This is just one happy post!
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{/Wednesday, January 11, 2006, @1:33 AM.
| Slacker Kid |
 You hated rules, authority, and structure. In fact, you still do. |
Who Were You In High School?
Hehe... i think this is quite true, in my own perspective.
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@1:30 AM.
| Your Hair Should Be Pink |
 |
Yeah yeah, to most of Flamez, this shows i have potential for cosplaying Sakura haha...
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@12:28 AM.
{ wHAT THE HELL? missing pple now?(i mean the kind whereby u feel u lost sth) }
Been pretty lazy to blog recently but after reading Pam's blog after a very long time, i suddenly miss Grad Nite Comm and our fellow dance mates ha! "Good things nv last" or sth like that was said by Ann Darrows in King Kong. Just watched it. The weather has been raining lately, but no fog ahha...
Just sent off Han and Grandpa in their coach to Msia. Feeling kinda calm and collected now, mayb even a little cold. Towards Potato... It's what Han said about her that left me in a self-contradictory state? That one thing bad about her other than her bad temper is her lack of respect for others. I couldn't really think of any epitomes whereby she manifested it at that time of discussion except her attitude towards old relatives like her grandma and our shared grandpa.
Regarding her grandma, i was taken aback at first when i became aware of such things and felt that her grandma would really be sad at her granddaughter's hollering and yelling at. Then, as i see more of them after staying at their house whenever i go back to Ayer Tawar, i came to realize that it's just the way different pple get along with each other.
Anyway, enough of negative feelings towards someone. Do you sometimes feel that the ways of the world are too complicated for u to ponder too much over that you just wanna get it out of ur mind and not think about it at all? That's how i feel whenever i try to work things out in my head but no avail. I'd get furious after it so it's pretty sucky. So again, i wanna get this out of my mind and not think about it at all. I can feel "fury" looking me up again..
Lemme see wad else. Oh ya, realized that w/o Han, or Orange as known to some of Flamez, i kinda miss it. We can talk about quite a lot of topics and it's only after his visit here this time that i realized it. But again, there are some things we dun necessarily agree on, like my beloved green Esprit sweater and any pair of black pants ahha...
Well well, memories. Me pairing up with him during soccer, winning kelvin and HChuen which made them have internal conflict ha, the discussion about the "weather", he clearing up my food cos he eats most things and i dun n on n on...
Been lazy or slacking much. Procrastination is the exact word cos i just keep putting things off. AH~! CAN'T CARRY ON LIKE THIS! Current specs now are really screwed but they are in a better condition after some handling by Ngee Ann Poly's spec shop uncle. I lost my temper on Sun night cos of certain issues(like can't cycle to sch) or i'm just feeling rotten at that period of time. You may just call it mood swings...
I just had to let it out by yelling in the middle of the night. It was already after 1am i think ahha, shd be Mon morning. That's why i shouted out of my window like "Damn", "Ta Ma de"(chi. version of damn), "fuck", and i forgot what. After that, i turned and threw myself on my bed, w/o the memory of putting my specs thr a moment ago. My poor specs had to withstand e weight of my immense body. I even teared a lil' bit of the bedspread, which was why i was must more pissed.
In the end, i reli had to do it. Bumped my forehead against the wall to get some pain. It's like slashing ur wrists or other parts of ur body though u hurt urself in the process. I finally understand why some people do it after trying similar attempts to numb myself too?
Alright, will stop here as i need to just remind myself of another case of loss of temper. Made specs straight after sch on Mon at Rach's poly. Cos it was raining, the umbrella was spoiled at one corner and i alighted at the wrong bus stop too. Suck it!
Gonna get new specs from Rach-chan on Sat when we meet up for shopping trip though i'm not sure if i'm really gona shop. Shit, haven transferred money into Rach's bank ahah! THANKS RACH AGAIN! the LITTLE REBEL XP
p.S. I think red specs is indeed rather ubiquitious and used by many others. This thought was further backed up by Rach-chan. In the past, i'd definitely deliberately not buy it. But i realize that i shouldn't care about what others use as long as i like it. Really... This idiosyncrasy has caused me to miss out on many things i really would like if i din care about what others use or do. Just another reminder for myself that my thoughts would eventually work themselves out. Like how i thought so much about the weather, and in the end, it wasn't as bad...
p.S.S here are some more pics from China trip. Guess i really need to make myself do bit by bit, my photo journal i mean. So enjoy. Though this is just the tip of the ice berg. The first part of our trip, the starting haha... Hope i can do my photo journal in this manner slowly though i'd categorize the pics ahha... It's all up to me. It's my photo journal after all aha...
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Just sent off Han and Grandpa in their coach to Msia. Feeling kinda calm and collected now, mayb even a little cold. Towards Potato... It's what Han said about her that left me in a self-contradictory state? That one thing bad about her other than her bad temper is her lack of respect for others. I couldn't really think of any epitomes whereby she manifested it at that time of discussion except her attitude towards old relatives like her grandma and our shared grandpa.
Regarding her grandma, i was taken aback at first when i became aware of such things and felt that her grandma would really be sad at her granddaughter's hollering and yelling at. Then, as i see more of them after staying at their house whenever i go back to Ayer Tawar, i came to realize that it's just the way different pple get along with each other.
Anyway, enough of negative feelings towards someone. Do you sometimes feel that the ways of the world are too complicated for u to ponder too much over that you just wanna get it out of ur mind and not think about it at all? That's how i feel whenever i try to work things out in my head but no avail. I'd get furious after it so it's pretty sucky. So again, i wanna get this out of my mind and not think about it at all. I can feel "fury" looking me up again..
Lemme see wad else. Oh ya, realized that w/o Han, or Orange as known to some of Flamez, i kinda miss it. We can talk about quite a lot of topics and it's only after his visit here this time that i realized it. But again, there are some things we dun necessarily agree on, like my beloved green Esprit sweater and any pair of black pants ahha...
Well well, memories. Me pairing up with him during soccer, winning kelvin and HChuen which made them have internal conflict ha, the discussion about the "weather", he clearing up my food cos he eats most things and i dun n on n on...
Been lazy or slacking much. Procrastination is the exact word cos i just keep putting things off. AH~! CAN'T CARRY ON LIKE THIS! Current specs now are really screwed but they are in a better condition after some handling by Ngee Ann Poly's spec shop uncle. I lost my temper on Sun night cos of certain issues(like can't cycle to sch) or i'm just feeling rotten at that period of time. You may just call it mood swings...
I just had to let it out by yelling in the middle of the night. It was already after 1am i think ahha, shd be Mon morning. That's why i shouted out of my window like "Damn", "Ta Ma de"(chi. version of damn), "fuck", and i forgot what. After that, i turned and threw myself on my bed, w/o the memory of putting my specs thr a moment ago. My poor specs had to withstand e weight of my immense body. I even teared a lil' bit of the bedspread, which was why i was must more pissed.
In the end, i reli had to do it. Bumped my forehead against the wall to get some pain. It's like slashing ur wrists or other parts of ur body though u hurt urself in the process. I finally understand why some people do it after trying similar attempts to numb myself too?
Alright, will stop here as i need to just remind myself of another case of loss of temper. Made specs straight after sch on Mon at Rach's poly. Cos it was raining, the umbrella was spoiled at one corner and i alighted at the wrong bus stop too. Suck it!
Gonna get new specs from Rach-chan on Sat when we meet up for shopping trip though i'm not sure if i'm really gona shop. Shit, haven transferred money into Rach's bank ahah! THANKS RACH AGAIN! the LITTLE REBEL XP
p.S. I think red specs is indeed rather ubiquitious and used by many others. This thought was further backed up by Rach-chan. In the past, i'd definitely deliberately not buy it. But i realize that i shouldn't care about what others use as long as i like it. Really... This idiosyncrasy has caused me to miss out on many things i really would like if i din care about what others use or do. Just another reminder for myself that my thoughts would eventually work themselves out. Like how i thought so much about the weather, and in the end, it wasn't as bad...
p.S.S here are some more pics from China trip. Guess i really need to make myself do bit by bit, my photo journal i mean. So enjoy. Though this is just the tip of the ice berg. The first part of our trip, the starting haha... Hope i can do my photo journal in this manner slowly though i'd categorize the pics ahha... It's all up to me. It's my photo journal after all aha...
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@12:25 AM.
Chocolates! Too nice to eat right? Bought it in a shop in the airport cos scared that plane food wouldn't be enough? The shop is a miracle itself. Simply divine haha.. Mine is the angel one and Cybell's the Santa Claus ahha...
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@12:24 AM.
just before we boarded the plane. as in we're in the enclosed "bridge" or the stretch of "floor" for u to walk before u reach the plane. i just dunno what u call it. Yeek and Cybell right b4 ur eyes.
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@12:24 AM.
Me and Hailin. i seriously dunno if the 2 people other than me who appear in this set of postings would kill me for putting their pic on my blog hahah... In the airport.
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@12:22 AM.
la la la la... i'm at a loss to what to write.
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@12:22 AM.
At the Cheng du airport. Really dirty and misty air! Sux la, me and Yeek both feel that the air in Xi'An is much cleaner and clearer. (Wooh, Clean and Clear) Lame...
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@12:21 AM.
Took this in the bus, as like the others. Another depiction of street life.
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@12:15 AM.
Me and Cybell. Seriously dunno if the 2 other human beings who appear in this set of postings would wanna kill me for putting their pic on my blog haha... in the airport too.
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{/Wednesday, January 04, 2006, @12:28 AM.
{ What i should do about the WEATHER? n school has reopened! Sucks but cant think like this. Yeah... m_M }
*Yesterday was the first day of school haha. Tired is just one word. Though i did try to make myself laugh loads or excite myself ahhaa... cos yesterday's early morning was spent on walking around, packing stuff to get ready ahha... *
*Not late yesterday! Time table sorta sucks... But one thing nice is we sorta went to look in on the mass dance. Damn Syid la... (Shit!) keep harping on the fact we can't really join in the mass dance. Ha, we're gonna try again though. (Me, Pam, Sheena, Poser 2 and Yeek was there.) Yeah yeah, i do love the Pump it mass dance! That'll have to wait till the camp, according to Shuhui. So it's Rock around the clock for just now haha... *
*It's quite nice to see everything from the back like watching a show as j1s and ogls squeezed and cheered. Gotta admit too, felt a bit sad that i din join OGL this time though when it was time for interview last year, Eve told us that she asked us but me and Pam was down as we answered 'No'. Pam was more down than me, if u wanted to know the exact details haha. *
The good thing we din join is we dun have to sacrifice more sleep as we already do for Grad Night, but mostly on that night itself only ha..
Rather funny, to think of it now. The reason why we were like that might be largely due to the fact that we're already in Grad Night Comm and according to Pam, her homework depresses her and everything was in a mess haaha...
alright then, really hope everything will go better this year haha... during GP, my group got 5 points while the rest mostly had 1s. kinda sad too, that i'm not Geog rep anymore but i shd think on the bright side that i dun have other things to drag me down at times. See ya all, and have fun everyone! I hAFTA make myself LURVE SCHOOL!
~-**-~
Dammit, what should i do about the weather? *Eve, you should know this!* I'm a mysterious person, like Kakashi-sensei, as u will know haha... I always leave clues like this, yeah...
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*Not late yesterday! Time table sorta sucks... But one thing nice is we sorta went to look in on the mass dance. Damn Syid la... (Shit!) keep harping on the fact we can't really join in the mass dance. Ha, we're gonna try again though. (Me, Pam, Sheena, Poser 2 and Yeek was there.) Yeah yeah, i do love the Pump it mass dance! That'll have to wait till the camp, according to Shuhui. So it's Rock around the clock for just now haha... *
*It's quite nice to see everything from the back like watching a show as j1s and ogls squeezed and cheered. Gotta admit too, felt a bit sad that i din join OGL this time though when it was time for interview last year, Eve told us that she asked us but me and Pam was down as we answered 'No'. Pam was more down than me, if u wanted to know the exact details haha. *
The good thing we din join is we dun have to sacrifice more sleep as we already do for Grad Night, but mostly on that night itself only ha..
Rather funny, to think of it now. The reason why we were like that might be largely due to the fact that we're already in Grad Night Comm and according to Pam, her homework depresses her and everything was in a mess haaha...
alright then, really hope everything will go better this year haha... during GP, my group got 5 points while the rest mostly had 1s. kinda sad too, that i'm not Geog rep anymore but i shd think on the bright side that i dun have other things to drag me down at times. See ya all, and have fun everyone! I hAFTA make myself LURVE SCHOOL!
~-**-~
Dammit, what should i do about the weather? *Eve, you should know this!* I'm a mysterious person, like Kakashi-sensei, as u will know haha... I always leave clues like this, yeah...
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{/Monday, January 02, 2006, @9:17 AM.
{ Happy new Year to all and CHEERS TO GRAD NITE COMM 05' }
Oh my my... It's a new year! I've got school tmr!!!
2005 is a very special year, in the sense that i had many "first times" .
- the first death of a relative when i'm old enough to understand the feeling of grief
- my first bday that was not celebrated in Spore
- the lost feeling among a whole lot of pple which includes loneliness and despair(adapting to a new school --->JJ)
- joining a committee to organise an event(Grad nite!!! Wooh! :p)
- went overseas with school(1st time without parents to XI'aN!lovely!!!)...
- lost my first digicam, or rather Pa's (after grad night, sigh, really sad, cos there were many pics i haven uploaded, included grad night itself and our play pics at Expo on xmas BOO! x::: i'm crying)
Well can't really rmb the rest now ahha...
Anyway, Grad Nite WAS A BLAST IN THE END! I think we really had a lota fun dancing when it was supposed to be the seniors but they didn't want to dance. aHa! I saw the wild side of many people, especially poser no. 2 or the wild kitty hahah. She took all of us away. It's unbelievable she never went clubbing.... Well, another reason is she must be too suppressed cos of school work and everything ahha... just kidding only k?
I guess that was a lot of fun cos it was so impromptu. Though some people din join in with us, we still had a lot of fun just wild partying. It's my first time in public too hahaa... Eve and Pam were also letting it all out. THAT IS JUST THERAPY! to prepare us for next year's busy and stressful study time!!
Grad Nite dancers, our performance was great too! Everything ended well too, though there was some problem with the emcee and the food was served too fast ahhaha...
I really had fun WITH u all, guys and gals... CHEERS TO GRAD NITE COMM 2005!:) Though Grad Nite has finally ended, this marks a new journey for all of us too. May our friendships and bonds made during this time last and we'll have loads of fun tgt in future too! HEE!! XO) tO ALL the teachers too!!
Dammit, gotta get ready for school tomorrow hee. Oh ya, i had fun at Xiaoxia's house too, the mahjong session. That was great gal! See you soon! I also felt closer with Pam hee hee... With rasyid, yvonne, diana... about See How we gonna go to school and survive the year ahead tmr k??? *_~ though i'm pretty sad i've got no pictures to post now. Gotta wait for others to send me hah...
One good thing is Pa and Ma weren't too harsh on me for the loss of my digicam. I really do (V)(love) them loads!!! The movie at 4am is quite funny to remember in the sense that i din even know there was a unicorn, the lion died, the white witch died and what else... Hmm... nvm, pam was also dozing off most of the times so she shares the same bewilderment with me haha...
The gathering yesterday wasn't too bad ha. Thanks Goh Hua! "Prawn Night", "The Halo Man", "magic" which was actually the chronicles of Narnia, "kerate which is create"... I really feel closer with my bro now haha, cos we'd always be the ones to talk to each other whenever we go to such a gathering. Thank goodness for Han too hehe. One funny thing, my bro was targeted to play bball and replace Han n he was talking bad about Old Macdonald hahaa...
HAPPY NEW YEAR TO ALL!!!
bEST WISHES FOR THE NEW YEAR AND ALL!
Think i really should work on my photo journal hhaha... Ciao and see ya all around, my dear frens and family! :)
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2005 is a very special year, in the sense that i had many "first times" .
- the first death of a relative when i'm old enough to understand the feeling of grief
- my first bday that was not celebrated in Spore
- the lost feeling among a whole lot of pple which includes loneliness and despair(adapting to a new school --->JJ)
- joining a committee to organise an event(Grad nite!!! Wooh! :p)
- went overseas with school(1st time without parents to XI'aN!lovely!!!)...
- lost my first digicam, or rather Pa's (after grad night, sigh, really sad, cos there were many pics i haven uploaded, included grad night itself and our play pics at Expo on xmas BOO! x::: i'm crying)
Well can't really rmb the rest now ahha...
Anyway, Grad Nite WAS A BLAST IN THE END! I think we really had a lota fun dancing when it was supposed to be the seniors but they didn't want to dance. aHa! I saw the wild side of many people, especially poser no. 2 or the wild kitty hahah. She took all of us away. It's unbelievable she never went clubbing.... Well, another reason is she must be too suppressed cos of school work and everything ahha... just kidding only k?
I guess that was a lot of fun cos it was so impromptu. Though some people din join in with us, we still had a lot of fun just wild partying. It's my first time in public too hahaa... Eve and Pam were also letting it all out. THAT IS JUST THERAPY! to prepare us for next year's busy and stressful study time!!
Grad Nite dancers, our performance was great too! Everything ended well too, though there was some problem with the emcee and the food was served too fast ahhaha...
I really had fun WITH u all, guys and gals... CHEERS TO GRAD NITE COMM 2005!:) Though Grad Nite has finally ended, this marks a new journey for all of us too. May our friendships and bonds made during this time last and we'll have loads of fun tgt in future too! HEE!! XO) tO ALL the teachers too!!
Dammit, gotta get ready for school tomorrow hee. Oh ya, i had fun at Xiaoxia's house too, the mahjong session. That was great gal! See you soon! I also felt closer with Pam hee hee... With rasyid, yvonne, diana... about See How we gonna go to school and survive the year ahead tmr k??? *_~ though i'm pretty sad i've got no pictures to post now. Gotta wait for others to send me hah...
One good thing is Pa and Ma weren't too harsh on me for the loss of my digicam. I really do (V)(love) them loads!!! The movie at 4am is quite funny to remember in the sense that i din even know there was a unicorn, the lion died, the white witch died and what else... Hmm... nvm, pam was also dozing off most of the times so she shares the same bewilderment with me haha...
The gathering yesterday wasn't too bad ha. Thanks Goh Hua! "Prawn Night", "The Halo Man", "magic" which was actually the chronicles of Narnia, "kerate which is create"... I really feel closer with my bro now haha, cos we'd always be the ones to talk to each other whenever we go to such a gathering. Thank goodness for Han too hehe. One funny thing, my bro was targeted to play bball and replace Han n he was talking bad about Old Macdonald hahaa...
HAPPY NEW YEAR TO ALL!!!
bEST WISHES FOR THE NEW YEAR AND ALL!
Think i really should work on my photo journal hhaha... Ciao and see ya all around, my dear frens and family! :)
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